


undead (but in love)

by dantes_wombat



Category: In the Flesh (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-15
Updated: 2018-07-15
Packaged: 2019-06-10 21:49:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15300732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dantes_wombat/pseuds/dantes_wombat
Summary: The advantages - and disadvantages - of being zombie boyfriends.





	undead (but in love)

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in 2014 but never published it - probably because I expected to add more pros and cons. It'll definitely remain a fragment now, so I thought 'why not post it' :)

Being in a relationship with another PDS-sufferer has its pros and cons. 

Pro: You don’t really need sleep, so you just do it for fun and for however long you like. There's no bad morning breath, either, which is basically the biggest PRO you can think of whenever you wake up and see Simon’s face close, so close. 

Con: You don’t eat, so your usual morning routine has gone to shit. Sometimes you imagine making coffee for yourself and Simon, maybe some eggs and toast; you imagine sleepy eyes meeting over mugs and comfortable silence until you’re both fully awake. Missing things that you’ve never had is a strange feeling. Not even the daily covering-up remains, now that you’re more comfortable with yourself. Strictly speaking, you don’t need to shower or bathe regularly either, because your body doesn’t produce sweat.

Pro: However, showering together is a perfect means of its own, as you soon discover, and a much better morning ritual than imaginary coffee. Afterwards, you often think you can smell the shampoo in Simon’s hair – just a whiff, just a little. Sometimes, you are awake sooner than him and use the time to hone your drawing skills. You reproduce things from memory as you’ve always done, your mother’s understanding smile, the worried expression on your father’s face, the rage and despair in Jem’s eyes; but nowadays, what you enjoy most is using what’s directly in front of you. You fill pages upon pages with Simon, from detailed studies of hands and eyelashes and the curve of a neck to full-on portraits.

When he saw your drawings for the first time, back in your old room after the funeral, he got that awed look on his face again, like he couldn’t quite believe it. 

“Stop it” you murmured, thankful that blushing is simply out of the question, now – another pro.

Con: Going out together is still brazing, no matter how confident you feel and how much you don’t care about Roarton’s opinion of you. The knowledge that you’re both PDS sufferers makes them stare; the fact that you are not wearing make-up and contacts makes them stare more; the way you hold hands in public and never leave more than an inch of space between you while walking makes them stare the hardest. 

Pro: Simon is no longer the only one who can paralyse with eyes that don’t seem to look at, but inside you; you have become undead-self-aware, so to say, and you know now that your eyes are stunning. You have developed a deviant pleasure in this new-found asset, and you use it mercilessly. It doesn’t matter if it’s just you and Simon in the bungalow, reading or watching TV, or if you’re among other people. You’ll look up and find his eyes, fixate him without blinking; you know his exact range of reactions by heart. If you’re in private, he won’t hesitate to stare back; you’re both completely still now.

Pro: Kissing. You enjoy kissing, you really do. And you don’t care if undead-kissing is any different from alive-kissing. Kissing makes Simon smile, and it’s only for you. “A special smile for special people” he whispers into your ear, fondly, and you both take a minute to think of another person as special as the two of you, who should be here smiling and laughing instead of back in the ground.


End file.
